Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Pondering Life...

10 years ago, one of my very dearest friends was diagnosed with Sarcoma. They found it in her lung, which was very rare and over the years, after treatment after treatment, it spread to her brain. Emily has endured so many medical treatments, some experimental, surgeries and radiation, one would truly wonder how any cancer could survive. But it has and now she is losing the battle. This weekend, I am traveling with Mike to Dallas, to spend my last weekend with her. Even as I write this, my body is numb and I am not sure how I am going to make it through.
I think anyone that reads this will know someone in their lifetime to be effected by cancer. I am so angry at what has happened and how cancer has not only taken over Emily's body but effected some other very close people to me.
I always wonder why it seems so prevalent now. Why I know so many people battling this very ugly disease. Is it because I am older? Is it because its more common? I scares me to think...why them...and why not me?
I look at my parents and in-laws and think to myself all the time how lucky they are to be here, alive and well, to see their grandchildren. I pray, more than you would ever know, that I am that blessed and granted the ability to live another 40+ years.
Life is not fair. I have learned that. My mom always said it to me as a kid...and now I believe her. I wish she was wrong. I really, really do.